But true bike cleaning is an art. Many people do it, but not many do it well. If you’re the type to just spray your bike down with the garden hose, by all means, read on.

The Tools
You’re going to get dirty, so choose your outfit accordingly. The dirty chain grease you clean off your bike can stain, like any other grease stain, but not the products listed below. The chain cleaner and degreaser will contain hazardous chemicals, so if you have sensitive skin, you should wear gloves. You'll need the following:

• Chain cleaner. This is not a solvent, it’s an actual apparatus that you clamp onto your chain, and then pedal the chain through. It may also be called a chain cleaning kit, a chain cleaning system, or a chain scrubber.
• Detail brush. Used for getting into tight access areas like around derailleurs, this brush has short, tough bristles and looks like an oversized toothbrush. Typically has a half-moon shaped gear comb on the opposite side of the handle.
• Bottle brush. A large brush used to dig out mud and dirt from your sprockets. Looks like a cone-shaped version of your sister’s round hairbrush.
• Tire brush. The unique design of this brush is for wrapping around your tires and sloughing off the grit.
• Sponge. Just an ordinary sponge works great for your frame.
• Degreaser. Used to wash any component that touches the chain: chainrings, derailleur pulley wheel, and derailleur cage.

Round up the following items from your home:

• Bucket. To fill with soap and water for washing.
• Dishwashing soap (or bike-specific soap). Used to wash the frame and other parts like the saddle.
• Garden hose. For spraying soap off your bike.
• Water bottle. For rinsing your bike’s delicate areas.

The Technique
Fill the bucket with hot, dish-soapy water. Start with the dirtiest part of your bike first – your chain. Use the chain cleaner, which comes with instructions. After you’ve run the chain through the cleaner, empty and refill it with the water in the bucket and run the chain through a few more times. The combination of using the chain cleaner and its degreaser followed by a second run-through in hot soapy water makes your chain sparkle.

Spray degreaser on the greasy parts - your chainrings, derailleur pulley wheel, and derailleur cage. Scrub with the detail brush. If your cassette is particularly grimy, turn the brush around and use the gear comb to floss out the gunk. Be careful not to drip solvent into the wheel bearings.

Clean the frame and other components with the hot soapy water and the sponge. For caked-on mud, use the tire brush, which wraps around the frame just as well as the tire. The brush will not scratch your frame. Use the bottle brush to get into the wheel hubs and other hard-to-reach places.

Use the tire brush for your tires, in combination with the bottle brush, and the hot soapy water. Don’t forget to get between the spokes on the rim. And for god’s sake man, don’t ever use Armor-All on your tires – it makes them slippery.

Rinse everything with the hose, using a spray nozzle on LOW PRESSURE. High pressure will blast the juice right out of places not meant to be fiddled with, such as the hubs, bottom bracket, and headset. For those delicate areas, skip the hose all together and use your water bottle.

Top her off with a light lubricant on the chain. Share the love with the pulley wheels, cables, and pivot points – anyplace where two parts move and are in contact with one another. Don’t forget to clean your brushes off. And remember, cleanliness is next to godliness.